It occurs to me...

[jawnbc]

...that nearly all my LJ buddies are gay men. In and of itself, not a problem.

But I'd sure like some more women/girl pals!

Are my journal postingss of marginal interest to non-gayboys? Is there some sort of cultural disconnect?

*Gulp*

Comments

[bentwright.livejournal.com]

Over in Diaryland (http://www.diaryland.com), I mostly mix with straight folks. SquirrelX (http://squirrelx.diaryland.com) is one of my favorite diaries.

[mommybabou.livejournal.com]

What the hell am I? Chopped liver?

MommyB
-une fille de style hetero-kétaine!

[minimac.livejournal.com]

Us women-folk loves ya!

[art-thirst.livejournal.com]

I sorta feel the same way. That's the one thing that really makes me feel uncomfortable in "gay settings." It might sound strange to some here, as it has to gay men I've known, I feel better with some women around, even if I'm not getting naked with 'em. It also feels better to me to have a woman screamer than a man screamer, IF one has to do some screamin'... and I've always been more open about my feelings with women than men, generally. :-)

[puzzld1.livejournal.com]

I'm a friend of Trapezebear. I'll volunteer to up your girl ratio,

[bearchow.livejournal.com]

Safe trip back to Oz .... *HUGS*

[vaneramos.livejournal.com]

When I joined LJ in April I did it to interact with other writers; I had no notion what a huge gay membership I would encounter. So my community here has developed in two intersecting spheres: bears and artsy types. I love the cross-pollination.

I have a much easier time interacting with woman than straight men, though.

Some of my straight LJ friends came from friends of friends, or doing a search for people with similar interests, or a couple of interesting communities I joined.

[jawnbc]

ben non, pas de tout! t'es fois, pas foie! ;)

[jawnbc]

Yay!

[jawnbc]

Done--thank you!!!!!

[jawnbc]

thanks Ivan--glad we got to see one another!

[ranger1.livejournal.com]

I've noticed the same with myself, as well as a slightly-embarrassing predilection for LJ-ers with cute pictures. So much for the egalitarianism of the written word.

[blue-by-you.livejournal.com]

Hi! My name is Lisa, but most around here call me Anois (an-wah). I found you through androkles and I'm also a friend of vwaffle. I'm happy to add you.

[jawnbc]

great! I've added you too. Interestingly, Anois is also a word in Irish (gaelige), meaning 'please'.

Go raibh milé maith agat anois (guh ruh mee-luh mah a-gut a-neesh), a thousand thank yous please

:)

[jawnbc]

I find myself at 39.32 years much more comfy in both queer and non-queer spheres (and the mixed spaces that are increasingly common in my life). I'm less inclined--most of the time, or maybe more of the time--to fret about how to present my emotional self to others. Something I very much like. But I'm also less willing to extent myself to making new friends, mostly due to a lack of energy. Some trade-off, eh?

[jawnbc]

I agree about straight men...and I've made so many interesting acquaintances via LJ through the Friends digressions, perhaps I just need to give it more time...

[jawnbc]

Well there is that base and carnal thing, but so too is there the "s/he sez interesting and eloquent things" aspect too.

Clever and carnal, that combo rocks doesn't it?

Re:

[blue-by-you.livejournal.com]

Yes it is! And there is a Gaelic band called Anois.

[ranger1.livejournal.com]

"I came for the eye candy, I stayed for the erudition."

str8s and female readers.

[darkphuque.livejournal.com]

There was a thread a while back on the BML about this very issue. I said that I didn't feel I was in some way missing something, and soundly trounced.
Now I do "know" women, some str8, some gay, but I've never thought of them in the same way as friends. Admittedly, my definition of "friend is very tight, and I don't move in circles where I would be in social situations with women. I also know that there could be some misogyny...due to the abuse at the hands good ol’ mum. I have one LJ Friend who is female...and that's interesting. I wonder.....

Its kinda the same thing with str8s. I have little to no interest in children. To me, having children and having puppies are much the same thing...with one huge difference...when you're done playing with puppies, you can but them back in their cage. If you do that with children, you get arrested. I had some str8 friends when I lived in Chicago. Eventually, they married and began families, and eventually we drifted apart....lack of commonalities, and their need to talk about their children, eclipsed any discussion of a new Chawan, or the recent Chaji....so all I have a few friends, all gay and all male. I have a number of people that I know, and with whom I do things...they are all Gay and male. Am I being shallow? Stubborn? Unrealistic?

That insular gay male community thing

[sinnabor.livejournal.com]

Seems to me that to maintain a friendship, you need some commonality. I guess you could actively work at it, but I can't say I've ever made an effort for someone who wasn't already a friend. (And, now that I think about it, most of my friends were dating material at one time or another. Another particularly gay thing.)

When straight folks get married and have kids, their lives are suddenly taken over by the needs of the kids. That is perhaps as it should be, but it makes them difficult to hang around with.

When a good deal of your leisure time is hanging around with friends at, say, The Lone Star (aka "The Loin Stare") or going to "play" parties... it seems to naturally follow that most of your friends will be gay men.

I'm not particularly concerned with that being good or bad. It just is.

Among the friends I see on a regular basis, I know one straight man and one straight woman, both single, both a little overweight, and both bitching about how hard it is to find anyone to date. They seem like a perfect match to me, but they have both nixed that idea. :-)

Of course, if you waste as much time on LJ as I am starting to, then the set of folks who could be your friends would be much larger. Which I suppose was the original point, and now I've painted myself into a corner.

[susandennis]

What a fascinating ha-ha you brewed up here!!! My my. I clicked on comments to add my 'what am I chopped liver..' but see that I got beat on that one and then got totally sucked up into all of the other links!

How really interesting!

But to answer your question... I find no cultural disconnect... And I also found a couple of new friends to try in your comments.

So thanks for the Bruhaha!!!

[mommybabou.livejournal.com]

I'm very quick on the what am I chopped liver! I have a trigger happy what am I chopped liver!

*giggle*

Damn, I must be more tired than I thought cuz this is making giggle way too damn much!

[mommybabou.livejournal.com]

La question est: As tu assez la foi pour des fois manger du foie?

*fwahahahahahahahaa!*

'sti qu'chu drole!

Re: That insular gay male community thing

[art-thirst.livejournal.com]

Very nice new portraits. :-) Yes, I read your entry too.

Re: str8s and female readers.

[jawnbc]

interesting...

Re: That insular gay male community thing

[jawnbc]

I appreciate your comments. And largely concur...ta!

[jawnbc]

I am happy to be exploited thusly!

[jawnbc]

non, tu!