my secrets for a happy relationship

[jawnbc]

1. Know your boundaries
2. Be flexible with your boundaries, especially over time
3. Be honest
4. No, really, be honest
5. However if you've done something really stoopid that would represent a betrayal to another, you get to eat it and live with it the first time--if you know it was a fucked up thing to do (guilt and shame can have a purpose)
6. Do it again and you need to confess
7. Not really sorry you did it, you need to get honest with your SO so they can make an informed decision about compatibility
8. There is no #8
9. If you don't know the difference between a request and a demand, you're probably single. Or so incredibly hawt it doesn't matter.
10. The Larch. The. Larch.
11. Take grooming advice from people with food in their hair (head, facial, body) with a grain of salt
12. Take communication advice from people who can't hold a conversation in a bucket with a grain of salt
13. Take longer-term relationship advice from people who have experience in longer-term relationships
14. Having an air of superiority is a turn-off (arrogance)
15. Conveying a sense of who you are is a turn-on (confidence)
16. One person's #14 is another's #15
17. If you really really really don't want to do something, better to be the asshole who said no than the asshole who caused drama by being a passive aggressive, whingy, tedious, killjoy
18. Size matters
19. Sex and love can be wholly distinct. But together they form a particularly heady mix
20. You can learn how to love only after learning how to be loved...which isn't the same thing as loving yourself exactly.

Comments

[nfotxn.livejournal.com]

Ding ding ding! Not that I really have much in the field but this seems to be a pretty good list.