a pleasant day
Mar. 8th, 2003 08:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jawnbcI was supposed to start a course today in my ancestral language--Irish--but the hour and fate meant otherwise. The course runs 09h30-12h30 Saturdays for 6 weeks.
What was I thinking? After a few days sick in bed, and a semi-latish night out with friends (mmm South Indian cuisine), the alarm went off and I said, “frig it.”
Instead I lolled in bed, rose around 11 and packed a bag for the beach. La Perouse to be a bit more precise, one of several beaches popular with gay men in Sydney, and clothing optional. Although I opt for a speedo, since I find tan lines very, very, very sexy--kinda like a glow-in-the-dark runway to pleasure, between the sheets. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more...
The bus ride was about 30 minutes, and quickly I found a spot. I had just bought a new beach blanket--brilliant purple--then took a quick dip, lubed up (I’m quite dark skinned, but I wear 15 SPF here, ozone hole). Then plugged into me iPod and kicked back. Ahhhh....
About 90 minutes later, my friend John showed up. He’s an interesting bloke, was married for a number of years, came out, is learning Sanskrit because of an interest in ancient sacred music (and the cultures from which they sprang). We chatted at length about boyfriend/friend issues (boundaries, which I’m a big fan of), spirituality (which I’m a big fan of) and notions of masculinity.
John’s one of these guys who described himself as ‘straight acting,” a term I find troubling-to-offensive. But am always keen to hear folks’ take on it. Invariably gay men I’ve met who strongly cling to the term are somewhat homophobic. And therefore tiresome, since I’m all about keen self-awareness, and when it’s time a pretty full-on, in-yer-face queer. John’s kewl though, not taking about him. Other guys. Many of whom are quite OK, save the self-loathing shite.
Somehow our chat led to a discussion about personal agency, or the ability to choose the course of one’s life. I’m not a big believer in the concept--not oppposed to it, just think we live in a world that limits our agency way more than most folks can see. Or will admit. And I get quite crabby when folks hold my experience--I’m a working class kid with a PhD--as evidence that “anyone can be whatever they want to be, if they work hard enough.” Rather misrepresentative methinks...
John gave me a ride home, and I thought it was about 15h30...and it was 16h40--and I had a coffee date at 17h00! D’oh. Quick shower, run to bus, mobile rings, coffee date who’s running late. Kewl. Deep breathing. We had a nice chat, and we shall certainly do it again. Oh, and he’s a hottie.
Oh muh gawd, did I say that out loud?
What was I thinking? After a few days sick in bed, and a semi-latish night out with friends (mmm South Indian cuisine), the alarm went off and I said, “frig it.”
Instead I lolled in bed, rose around 11 and packed a bag for the beach. La Perouse to be a bit more precise, one of several beaches popular with gay men in Sydney, and clothing optional. Although I opt for a speedo, since I find tan lines very, very, very sexy--kinda like a glow-in-the-dark runway to pleasure, between the sheets. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more...
The bus ride was about 30 minutes, and quickly I found a spot. I had just bought a new beach blanket--brilliant purple--then took a quick dip, lubed up (I’m quite dark skinned, but I wear 15 SPF here, ozone hole). Then plugged into me iPod and kicked back. Ahhhh....
About 90 minutes later, my friend John showed up. He’s an interesting bloke, was married for a number of years, came out, is learning Sanskrit because of an interest in ancient sacred music (and the cultures from which they sprang). We chatted at length about boyfriend/friend issues (boundaries, which I’m a big fan of), spirituality (which I’m a big fan of) and notions of masculinity.
John’s one of these guys who described himself as ‘straight acting,” a term I find troubling-to-offensive. But am always keen to hear folks’ take on it. Invariably gay men I’ve met who strongly cling to the term are somewhat homophobic. And therefore tiresome, since I’m all about keen self-awareness, and when it’s time a pretty full-on, in-yer-face queer. John’s kewl though, not taking about him. Other guys. Many of whom are quite OK, save the self-loathing shite.
Somehow our chat led to a discussion about personal agency, or the ability to choose the course of one’s life. I’m not a big believer in the concept--not oppposed to it, just think we live in a world that limits our agency way more than most folks can see. Or will admit. And I get quite crabby when folks hold my experience--I’m a working class kid with a PhD--as evidence that “anyone can be whatever they want to be, if they work hard enough.” Rather misrepresentative methinks...
John gave me a ride home, and I thought it was about 15h30...and it was 16h40--and I had a coffee date at 17h00! D’oh. Quick shower, run to bus, mobile rings, coffee date who’s running late. Kewl. Deep breathing. We had a nice chat, and we shall certainly do it again. Oh, and he’s a hottie.
Oh muh gawd, did I say that out loud?
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no subject
Date: 2003-03-08 06:34 am (UTC)It is a bit troubling, isnt it? On the other hand, I guess its useful shorthand to describe something we dont realy have an alternative word/words for, unless you revert to words like non gay acting or somethinh equally bad. Or are there better ways I havent been exposed to/thought of?
no subject
Date: 2003-03-09 12:14 am (UTC)I also thought straight-acting meant cum, fall asleep, snore, belch. Not terribly appealing to me....zzzzzzz