jawnbc | My head is thick; sorry no pics

Every now and then I get it right. Bang on. Bull’s eye. Hammer on the button. Like this.

Most of the day was spent leisurely roasting, chopping and peeling (Ma loses her wind peeling prawtees, sheesh). Everything served was baked or boiled within an inch of its life. We didn’t know when the mob would descend, so the 3 of us--Da, Ma and me--were in the kitchen and breakfast nook for most of it. Kathleen’s brood showed up around 14h45, and her older girls rather quickly started helping out. Gawd they’re great. Tommy and his ilk followed around 15h30--they’d stopped at Nanny’s en route. Mike the mystery brother was delivered about 15 minutes later by Da--Mike had bought XBOX games for Kath’s kids, so he brought his XBOX so they could experience immediate Christmas gratification. Up top in my room were Mike and the nephews XBOXING. On the main floor was the kitchen crew. In the basement Tom and I mocked teased and demoralized various children, an Oirish form of nurturing (”don’t be so gawddamned sensitive--if Uncle Jawn meant it he’d nevah say it ta ya face”). Only tears were tears of laughter.

2 shifts for dinner: grandkids at 16h00; adults at 17h00. 3 roast beefs, 2 turkey breasts, 4kg of mashed potatoes, creamed onions, stuffing galore, turnips, sweet corn and groovy. While the lil phreaks were stuffing their gobs, we watched the DVD I made of the Atlantic City trip.

toneyvr and the girls in Vancouver found it amusing, but we all roared with laughter. Brenda, our aunt with Down’s Syndrome, was queen and star of both the day and the video. She sings! She yodels! She’s flatulent! And if you’re talking when she wants to, she sez “SHADDUP!” And we do...briefly.

After both shifts at the trough, everyone else (’cept me and Tom) troughed up for the desserts: ice cream sundaes, Boston cream pie, the sort of things every family decimated by Type II diabetes must have during the holidays. I don’t have a terribly strong sweet tooth (slurps Coke Classic).

Here’s a couple of photos I snapped of the whole gang of grandkids,

And another of the immediate family.

It turns out this wasn’t the first Christmas we all spent together since ‘--it was the first one ever. In the time I’ve been in Canada, either my brother or sister (or brother-in-law or sister-in-law) merely popped in before dinner en route to somewhere’s else. And by my calculation 2 Slatterys (Kath still feigns taking her husband’s name--ha!) and 1 Egan (Tommy’s youngest) weren’t even born until the 90s. So yesterday was a first--and therefore a last. So it was Ma and Da, Kath and Marty (Jenn, Jacquie, Jessie, Marty, Katie, Richie & Grace), Mike, Tom and Theresa (Caitlin, Casey & Christina) and me.

In typical Egan fashion, in the crunch everyone was on best behaviour. No major arguments, lots of hugs and kisses and laughter, and Ma fairly beamed. By 7pm everyone had left. Nanny finally returned chez elle around 9pm, so I popped over for a hug and kiss and goodbye. Sob. Then I spent a couple of hours at the foot of Ma and Da’s bed, chatting with Ma. Enjoying her bliss. Eventually she couldn’t stay awake any longer. She pushed herself up off her pillow, grabbed me in a great hug and kiss and said “thank you so much for coming and helping and everything!”

I slept perhaps 60 minutes last night. Then up, abluted, Da drove me to the airport. I decided that there are bigger issues in life than an insensitive father, and had internally forgiven his trespasses (committed to doing so, anyway). On the ride to JFK I made sure to tell him I’d be there within 36 hours if he were to call, that he could count on me, and that I admire and appreciate how well he takes care of Ma. A handshake, the gauntlet of a holiday airline terminal, and I was flying home. I was so fatigued--in every sense--that I was nauseated. I eventually took a sleeping pill and slept about 4 hours of the 5.5 hour flight. Wonderful

toneyvr was where he was supposed to be, and he served me tea and hugs while I had a good cry. Eventually I had to take a nap, I was so worn out.

I can’t believe it’s over. In July I had to re-arranged--no, I wanted to re-arrange--my life to accommodate Ma’s declining health. It meant leaving

querrelle, living in cramped quarters (with great friends) in Hongcouver, and jetting back and forth to NY thrice. And all day yesterday I knew I had managed to get it right: I was where I was supposed to be, and did what needed to be done. Ma knows I love her. The whole family got some quality time together. And

querrelle and I are strong too. Everything has worked out.