Senor Wences? S'alright, s'OK

[jawnbc]

A proctologist claims that these are actual comments made by his patients while he was performing colonoscopies:

1. “Take it easy, Doc, you’re boldly going where no man has gone before.”
2. “Find Amelia Earhart yet?”
3. “Can you hear me NOW?”
4. “Oh boy, that was sphincterrific!”
5. “Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not, in fact, up there?”
6. “You know, in some states, we’re now legally married.”
7. “Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?”
8. “You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. You do the Hokey Pokey....”
9. “Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!”
10.”If your hand doesn’t fit, you must aquit!”
11. “Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.”
12. “You used to be an executive at Enron, didn’t you?”

Comments

[shawnsyms.livejournal.com]

How come my doctor doesn't touch me there? My massage therapist did once.

[god-boy.livejournal.com]

I can give you his phone number... i get a commission

[jawnbc]

your doctor either very professional. Or blind. Or intimidated by your beauty.

Or a big ole bottom.

[shawnsyms.livejournal.com]

I don't mind in some ways, because I don't find my doctor attractive. But should he be putting his finger up my ass anyway, for some medical reason?

[jawnbc]

actually yeah. Prostate checks once a year or so are important, and if you're at all sexually active with your pooper shooter he should do a visual to check for STDs or abrasions etc. Some docs are now doing Pap smears to see if HPV in boy butts will lead to anal or rectal cancers (it's been somewhat linked to cervical cancer in women). FWIW.

[shawnsyms.livejournal.com]

Well, the last time I got fucked was on January 10 — of last year. It was really, really good though.

Maybe I'll ask my doc to take a look...